Woman hugging herself

How to Give Yourself Grace: 13 Ideas to Get Your Started

Learn how to give yourself grace, something we all need to do more often! Giving yourself grace is so important and is what God does for us, so we should too!

As individuals, we often hold ourselves to high standards and expectations, whether it pertains to our personal lives or work.

While it is important to strive for excellence in these areas, it can often result in feeling overwhelmed, stressed, and ultimately, burnt out.

That’s where giving yourself grace comes in. Grace is the act of offering oneself kindness and forgiveness, especially in difficult or trying times.

If you’re like most people, you have a lot of pressure on yourself to be perfect. It can be hard to enjoy life when you don’t give yourself grace.

The good news is, there are plenty of ways to extend yourself some grace and feel God’s love and mercy for you.

Here’s some tips on how to have grace for yourself.

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How to Give Yourself Grace

Here are some of the best ways to give yourself grace. Hopefully these tips will help you get started on your journey:

Accept Yourself

Accept yourself as you are now, not as what you wish you were.

There’s a difference between accepting yourself as you are now and accepting yourself as what you wish you were.

Accepting yourself as you are now is the first step towards giving yourself grace. It’s also a necessary part of practicing self-care, because if we don’t pay attention to our needs, who else will?

Accepting yourself doesn’t mean numbing out or denying your feelings, though it may feel that way at first. Accepting that there is no need for change in order for us to be worthy of love (and therefore, happiness) is fundamental to self-care and keeping our minds healthy.

Remember Your Success

Recognize the areas where you’ve improved, or where you’re trying your best.

You’re trying. You really are. And that’s not something to dismiss or ignore. Being a human means you will make mistakes, but it also means that you can do things right, too.

So give yourself credit for the times where you have been successful or have tried your best—and don’t let guilt about what’s left behind distract from those moments of grace.

Respond to Yourself Like You Would a Friend

Ask yourself how you’d react if a loved one shared the same negative thoughts with you.

Would you be supportive if your child shared the same negative thoughts with you? Would you be understanding and patient?

Would you try to help her understand that she doesn’t deserve to feel this way, or would you tell her that this is just how things are and there’s nothing wrong with feeling negative sometimes?

When someone shares something personal with us, our instinct should be to offer comfort and support rather than judgment and criticism.

And yet when we find ourselves behaving badly we often do exactly what we wouldn’t want done unto ourselves: We judge ourselves harshly for having done it; we call ourselves names; we take away our own love until there’s nothing left but self-hatred waiting inside us like a bomb set for detonation by any trigger (even if it’s only a memory).

That has got to change. We must give ourselves grace instead of judgment.

So, when you start to feel those judgments popping up, try talking to yourself as you would your child or best friend.

Practice Self-Compassion instead of Perfectionism

Perfectionism can be a problem. Perfectionists often set standards that are unattainable and unproductive, which can lead to stress and anxiety.

Perfectionists may also avoid making decisions in the first place because they’re afraid of failure.

One way to tackle perfectionism is by practicing self-compassion rather than self-criticism.

Self-criticism is about being hard on ourselves for our perceived flaws, whereas self-compassion involves treating ourselves with kindness when we fail or make mistakes.

A crucial aspect of this is learning to celebrate the small wins and progress you make, even if they are not perfect. Often, individuals tend to focus solely on their flaws and setbacks, causing them to feel discouraged and unmotivated.

Woman talking positively to herself in mirror

However, by making an effort to focus on the positive aspects of your journey, you can maintain a healthy mindset and momentum towards achieving your goals.

It is important to remember that progress is not always linear and that every step counts towards your ultimate success. By acknowledging and celebrating these small wins, you can boost your confidence and motivate yourself to keep moving forward with a positive attitude.

Self-compassion is really the same as giving yourself grace.

Forgive Yourself

To give yourself grace, you need to recognize that making mistakes is a part of being human. You’re going to make mistakes and you can’t change the past, but you can change your future.

Remember that making mistakes is an opportunity to learn and grow, and that it is okay to fail.

Without mistakes, it would be impossible to seek improvement and progress, and you would be stagnant in your personal or professional life. So, instead of dwelling on mistakes, try to focus on the lessons learned and how you can improve in the future.

Forgive yourself for not being perfect. Show yourself grace when you fall short of meeting your expectations or someone else’s expectations of how you should behave or perform.

Ultimately, giving yourself grace and accepting that mistakes are a part of being human can lead to a happier and more fulfilling life, both personally and professionally.

Use Daily Positive Affirmations for Giving Yourself Grace

Negative self-talk can be a vicious cycle that diminishes self-worth and hinders personal growth. If left unchecked, the negative self-talk can lead to anxiety, depression and other mental health issues.

However, it is possible to reframe negative self-talk by creating and utilizing positive affirmations. These affirmations act as a mental shield against self-doubt and negative emotions, and help build a positive outlook towards oneself.

Creating specific positive affirmations tailored to individual needs and goals can be an effective way to replace negative self-talk.

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Incorporating these affirmations into daily routines, such as repeating them during meditation or writing them down, can be an effective method to change the internal monologue and improve overall mental well-being.

Therefore, reframing negative self-talk into positive affirmations is a valuable tool that can help individuals give themselves grace and improve their mental health.

Some affirmations for giving yourself grace are:

  • I am not a failure
  • I am not a disappointment
  • I am worthy of love and belonging

You deserve to be here, in this life and in this body. You have done more with your time on Earth than most people will ever achieve in their entire lives, and you are still learning every day.

You can do hard things because you are strong enough to handle them—you just need some faith in yourself!

Check out these biblical affirmations to get you started.

Study Grace in the Bible

To learn more about grace, the best place to start is reading about God’s grace. The more you know about God, you will learn how loving, kind, and gentle He is to you, no matter what you have done.

The more you learn about mercy and grace from the scriptures, the more you will feel His grace naturally in your life, and you will give yourself more grace too!

Practice Self-Care

When it comes to taking care of ourselves, we often prioritize external responsibilities and neglect our personal needs. However, practicing self-care is essential for maintaining physical and mental well-being.

One effective way to give yourself grace is to make self-care a regular priority in your life. This can include activities like exercise, meditation, and getting enough sleep.

Exercise not only benefits our physical health but also releases endorphins that help boost our mood and reduce stress.

Read these encouraging scriptures on stress.

Meditation can help us manage anxiety and promote relaxation. Consistently getting enough quality sleep is crucial for maintaining our energy levels and improving our cognitive function.

By incorporating these activities into your routine, you can create a more balanced and fulfilling lifestyle. Remember, taking care of yourself is not selfish but necessary for being able to give your best self to yourself and others.

Surround Yourself with Positive People

Surrounding yourself with positive and supportive people is critical in giving yourself grace. Negative and unsupportive people can affect our lives in numerous ways by bringing unwanted stress and negativity into our daily lives.

By surrounding ourselves with positive and encouraging people, we can feel empowered and motivated to navigate life’s challenges with more ease.

It’s important to seek out individuals who uplift and inspire us, whether that be friends, family members, or support groups. These individuals can provide us with the emotional support and strength we need when we feel overwhelmed or stuck.

Read these Psalms for strength too.

Woman hugging herself

Additionally, spending time with positive people can improve our overall well-being and mental health, helping us to focus on our self-care and self-love.

By intentionally choosing who we surround ourselves with, we can create a supportive environment that enables us to give ourselves grace and grow into our best selves.

This also includes on social media. So often we compare ourselves, especially as struggling moms, to others we see who look happier. This brings us down.

Don’t Compare Yourself to Others

One of the most important ways on how to give yourself grace is to avoid comparing yourself to others and their accomplishments. It’s all too common to fall into the trap of comparing your own achievements with those of others, particularly in our modern social media world where constant comparisons are readily available.

However, this habit can be extremely detrimental to mental health and self-esteem in the long run. In fact, studies show that constant comparison can lead to feelings of inadequacy, jealousy, and even depression.

To give yourself grace, focus on your own journey and progress, and celebrate your successes along the way. Remember that everyone has their own path and timeline, and your accomplishments are unique to you.

The best thing I learned on how to give myself grace was to unfriend people who were negative all the time or who I would find myself constantly comparing myself to and feeling down.

This helped me tremendously to finally start to give myself grace.

Set Realistic Expectations

Setting realistic expectations is an essential part of giving yourself grace. It’s easy to get caught up in unrealistic expectations that may cause you to feel like a failure if you can’t meet them.

Setting achievable goals will help you stay motivated and avoid the temptation to quit because you feel like you’re not making progress. Consider breaking down large goals into smaller, more manageable steps to give yourself a sense of accomplishment along the way.

Be honest with yourself about what you can realistically accomplish based on your current situation and resources. Avoid comparing yourself to others and focus on your progress to avoid disappointment or discouragement.

By setting realistic expectations, you will be more likely to succeed and feel good about the journey you are on.

Sometimes you will make a goal and ask God if that is right for you and He might say no. Learn how to trust God when He says no.

You might also like Why Won’t God Heal Me?

Give Yourself Rest

One of the fundamental practices of self-grace is taking breaks and rest periods. In today’s fast-paced and highly competitive world, the importance of productivity and achieving targets is highly emphasized.

However, constantly pushing ourselves to work for extended periods can lead to burnout, stress, and decreased work quality.

Taking regular breaks and rest periods helps to rejuvenate your mind, increase your focus and productivity while reducing stress, and improving your overall well-being.

By ensuring that you take breaks, you can step back, rejuvenate yourself, and gain a fresh perspective on current work-related challenges. By doing this, you’ll find that you can approach issues differently and come up with better, more creative solutions.

So, take a break, give yourself grace, and come back to work energized and more productive.

Make Time for Activities that Bring you Joy

In addition to prioritizing self-care practices, another effective way to give yourself grace is to make time for activities that bring you joy and fulfillment.

Engaging in activities that you enjoy can help reduce stress, increase happiness, and promote overall well-being. These activities could include anything from reading a book, practicing yoga, or taking a cooking class.

The key is to find activities that align with your interests and passions and prioritize them in your schedule. By making time for activities that nourish your soul, you are giving yourself permission to prioritize your happiness and overall emotional health.

Remember, taking time for yourself is not selfish, it is necessary for a healthy and balanced life.

How to Show Yourself Grace Wrap-Up

Now you know more about how to give yourself grace with these simple tips.

Giving yourself grace is an important act of self-care and compassion. Remember to give yourself the gift of grace not just once, but regularly, make it a habit. It will help you lead a happier and healthier life.

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